At work, the unnamed, faceless They are remodeling the bathrooms and kitchen.  My office building is smallish, resembling nothing more than a house.  Except it’s not.  It’s hard to describe. . . but the point is, when one comes through reception, one is in the center of the building.  There are only two wings, in a lovely straight line.  The kitchen is in between, a narrow little space with a rollaway dishwasher, fridge, coffee machine, and microwave.  It is also the only way to reach the two bathrooms.  For a building that holds roughly twenty people daily, two bathrooms seems like wishful thinking.

Anyway, they have been recently sanded, spackled, and painted, and today they ripped up the flooring or at least covered the old-school linoleum with a new-school linoleum, a hodgepodge of cork and something and linseed oil.  It sounded very neat.  However, to re-floor the bathroom, the toilets had to be removed.  Once the bathrooms were done, the kitchen had to be done, thereby blocking off the bathrooms.  Also the fridge was in the hall, and the dishwasher had a microwave on it and there was much chaos.  Also it was loud.  The gentlemens, somewhat on the flirty side, had a heavy duty high strength industrial fan all up in that there bathroom to dry the. . . something.  And it was all blowy in my ear-regions.

The point is, when the only two toilets in the entire building have gone on hiatus, one either has to run next door to the neighboring business and use theirs, or just hold it and dance, and hold it and whimper, and hold it and feel one’s eyes overflow with what one hopes to God and Jesus and holy things is tears, and then race home ten minutes early and cough in the stairwell while clenching all other muscles so nothing bad happens and then walk up the stairs, not run, because running means jostling and that is baaaaaaaaaaaad and then fly through the door, disrobe haphazardly and finally make it to a working(thank Jeebus) toilet.  And then cry with relief and because one’s body is now very, very angry.  And someone is going to pay.

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